How does asking for extras typically work? What ways bring best results?

[evanyory]

I have only had one extra(hj) in a session and it only happened because the woman asked if I wanted a release towards the end of the session. She asked in a dominant way of saying that it was actually for her and my release was her reward for defeating me, however looking back it may have been just a good way for her to burn down the clock.

Looking at some reviews it appears that a lot more woman are open to things, especially simple hand and foot jobs. Even something like kissing that I thought was more of a gfe seems to be more practiced.

My question is how do you best bring things up? Do you just wait for the provider to offer in the session and accept if you want to? Do you explicitly ask in an email if they are fine with hj, fj, bj and kissing? I can see how that may be the best way but to me it seems a little creepy or overly thirsty to be so cut and dry. Finally, do you wait until the session itself and ask in person for those things.

In some way I guess the worst that can happen is she says no, but I can also see an unwarranted ask ruining the vibe and now the lady sees you as just another creep.

Also, has anyone had any luck with women who say they dont provide sexual services on their profile? I can see that disclaimer being a valid thing and they are simply saying to not ask. I can also see it as a way to avoid legal issues.

What is your best practice.

[evanyory]

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[FBBMW]

Try to get a clue in the SG's profile.  If they say no nude, nothing sexual, asking for that might risk getting no response and
the odds are low anyway.   
Some will say to ask if you don't see what you want. These are probably confident enough to say no but still meet.

HJ, FJ, Kiss should be safe enough to ask with most.  After you have met once, you will have better odds of getting more in
the future.       

You will encounter thin and thick skins when asking those questions.   

[evanyory]

I take it the best time to ask is in the emails and not in person? Would it be a good rule of thumb to just not ask for something sexual that has not been mentioned or implied in emails?

[nujerz84]

Everyone has different approaches ..i never felt comfortable asking before hand. 1. I was paranoid of my emails getting hacked so privacy converns. 2. Also my thought process for like Legal reasons I felt now there a trail of you pretty much admitting to being a john when asking.

3. I felt asking before hand is not a good look as it comes off desperate and I felt ladies would easily pick up on it.

And lastly Id say vast majority of times I got extras it was simply two people vibing and reading each others body language it comes off more natural as opposed to feeling forced as part of the job.

There really is no easy way to ask without coming off like a horny schmoe just be honest and respectful as possible in what you are looking for, most ladies who are true pro's have seen/read it all.

And remember YMMV always.

[artax]

I agree with the above approach - I never ask or assume ahead of time - however if you do some research - read post here , follow their social media, etc - you can get a pretty good sense of who is open and not open to extras - some will tell you in there response and some will even mention different price points for different services

[Boselectah]

I always ask about sexual services in initial enquiries - I've never received an indignant response or some other form of opprobrium from them. Indeed, I've had a few comment positively about my being candid and upfront.

In terms of bringing the subject up during a session I always frame my request like this: would you mind if I........ insert whatever intimate act you'd like, could be something quite chaste like "licked your abs" or something more steamy. It might sound corny but fact they have to YES to turn you down and NO to give you permission makes them pause to think. Aside from that, it's a very polite, unthreatening and respectful turn of phrase. Even if they knock you back it's not much of a buzzkill moment, it doesn't feel negative or awkward.

[evanyory]

I always ask about sexual services in initial enquiries - I've never received an indignant response or some other form of opprobrium from them. Indeed, I've had a few comment positively about my being candid and upfront.

In terms of bringing the subject up during a session I always frame my request like this: would you mind if I........ insert whatever intimate act you'd like, could be something quite chaste like "licked your abs" or something more steamy. It might sound corny but fact they have to YES to turn you down and NO to give you permission makes them pause to think. Aside from that, it's a very polite, unthreatening and respectful turn of phrase. Even if they knock you back it's not much of a buzzkill moment, it doesn't feel negative or awkward.

Now I imagine that in an email you dont ask women who explicitly say "No sexual services" on their profile. Or, are you saying that if asked politely and clearly the worse is they just repeat what their profile says.

I like your way of asking. It is very upfront but sound very hot. How do you phrase it if the action is something they do to you like a hj? Or do you ask if you can jerk off to them and see if they offer to do it for you and then what happened after that happens?

[busthemus2003]

Ask for nude muscle worship on the 2nd or 3rd email and work up from there....

[crazycrazy]

I agree with both approaches:

1. Do the required searches before you contact a session provider. Reviews are a good place to start as even a discreet review may mention how happy a reviewer was with the experience. Some mention how "sensual" a provider was. There are also some session providers who advertise on escort sites. These are the only ads I would respond to saying I would like more than just a platonic encounter.

2. Treat a session like a date where you dress properly and take care that you appear at your best. Don't neglect your nails or show up with bad breath. Humour and humility will open a woman's mind to you in the same way as good looks and self-confidence. As the interactions progress you will send each other signals that may open options or may show that there are limits that must be respected. Your interactions may lead further than you would have expected just based on chemistry and how each person's day is going. A woman may not consent to do things you had expected were agreed upon if she is uncomfortable or senses somehow that it is not safe to be in a compromising position with you.

I once had an appointment with a respected bjj practitioner where I expected a very strenuous physical contest. Nothing I had read led me to expect any sexual element to this engagement. We rode the elevator together up to her room. It was brutally hot outside, but I had worn fashionable pants and a crisp, patterned short sleeve shirt. My sandals were clean and I carried a small shoulder bag with my wrestling shorts and tank top. This woman was Latina, and my experience in Latin America gave me the clues of how to dress and how to behave in a respectful and professional manner. She looked me up and down on the elevator, and she nodded appreciatively at my clothes as if to approve of how I had presented myself. When we got into her room we had a casual chat before we both changed. She jumped me, put me on my back, and worked my arms into a few painful holds to show that she could do so even though she was much smaller than I am. Then she just went ahead and handled me as if we were on very intimate terms. It was all I could do to last through the hour.

To this day I am convinced it was the clothes that opened up the options.

[BigelowMask]

If you are only looking for extras then it's very important to ask well beforehand to avoid any misunderstanding.

[diggs]

Some ladies are very conservative in their posted descriptions of their services so that they don't appear to be offering prostitution. One on one, they may be open to more things.

Realistically, if their goal is to foster return clients, they can't afford to have us going away frustrated. Just sayin'.

[DCReviews]

Just because I have not seen it yet but to state the obvious there are certain services that you look for on certain websites, if you want something of a more sexual nature for your session there definitely are escort sites out there where muscular girls advertise and obviously they will be open to a wide variety of kinks and fetishes in addition to sexual services so that you would not have to wonder if they would be willing to perform them.  On these websites you can be very upfront and honest and blunt about what you are looking for. 

[Ejuc333]

I always ask about sexual services in initial enquiries - I've never received an indignant response or some other form of opprobrium from them. Indeed, I've had a few comment positively about my being candid and upfront.

In terms of bringing the subject up during a session I always frame my request like this: would you mind if I........ insert whatever intimate act you'd like, could be something quite chaste like "licked your abs" or something more steamy. It might sound corny but fact they have to YES to turn you down and NO to give you permission makes them pause to think. Aside from that, it's a very polite, unthreatening and respectful turn of phrase. Even if they knock you back it's not much of a buzzkill moment, it doesn't feel negative or awkward.

I have seen one SG a couple times and in the first session, I didn't ask about anything in advance, but during the session I would ask if we could kiss, where I could touch, etc.  She offered HJ at the end.
Second session I asked for a shower in advance and she said yes.  During session asked to DATY and was granted access.  Both times she noted that she appreciated being asked and not having me assume I could do whatever I wanted.

[wrestlebrett]

I have done sessions for more than 25 years. For a long time, there was in my experience no extras. This is probably my loss, and I never asked, but no one ever offered.  In the last 3-5 years, I have gotten many extras, mostly just randomly but occasionally by me asking.

There is one very welll-endowed session girl I was meeting for the first time several years ago. I had not asked for extras, but when I saw her body in person, I was struggling not to lose it, LOL. It was a wow. Anyway, we were rolling on the bed and I said, "Is there any way you could lose this top?" She quickly said yes and proceeded to rub those boobs all over my face and crotch, then finished with an HJ. Later, it progressed to FS, BJ and DATY.

I think much of the advice here is solid but I tend to ask over email. Those who I have had frequent extras with, I do not ask as we have sort of an understanding, so to speak. But for the rest, if I am interestedi in that as part of the session, I will ask over email.

But there ARE a good percentage of women who aren't into "extras" with strangers and won't consent at any point. And you do risk ruining a relationship with those.

I have only had one extra(hj) in a session and it only happened because the woman asked if I wanted a release towards the end of the session. She asked in a dominant way of saying that it was actually for her and my release was her reward for defeating me, however looking back it may have been just a good way for her to burn down the clock.

Looking at some reviews it appears that a lot more woman are open to things, especially simple hand and foot jobs. Even something like kissing that I thought was more of a gfe seems to be more practiced.

My question is how do you best bring things up? Do you just wait for the provider to offer in the session and accept if you want to? Do you explicitly ask in an email if they are fine with hj, fj, bj and kissing? I can see how that may be the best way but to me it seems a little creepy or overly thirsty to be so cut and dry. Finally, do you wait until the session itself and ask in person for those things.

In some way I guess the worst that can happen is she says no, but I can also see an unwarranted ask ruining the vibe and now the lady sees you as just another creep.

Also, has anyone had any luck with women who say they dont provide sexual services on their profile? I can see that disclaimer being a valid thing and they are simply saying to not ask. I can also see it as a way to avoid legal issues.

What is your best practice.