Being not "involved" during a session

[Makko2]

Hi all,
as I explained in other posts, I have not a huge experience in sessions, having done only two of them in a 15 years span. My last session was in 2018 or 2019. In both cases it happened to me to feel "detached" from the session I chose by myself, overwhelmed by a sort of apathy.
I try to better explain me: during the first session my first concern was what to do, and how to behave. During the second session I was more comfortable, but after a quarter of hour I start to feel my self less motivated and not at my ease.
I have analyzed myself and these were my concerns, in general:
- Fear of doing something "illegal" (also in a session without explicit sensual involvements)
- Lack of fantasy during session: I am more for a lift and carry session with some muscle worship moments, but in both sessions these things did not lasted very long. And so I was there without any other request to do. A sort of "freezed" like.
- General difficulty in having a open relation with the provider: in both sessions a part of me wondered if they were at their ease with me, If they were happy or do it only waiting me going out from the room (although no one of the to session girls was demostrating me to be not involved in what they were doing).
- Being not very involved by the sessionist herself: I chose both of them because I liked them, but perhaps more why because review of the were positive and I wanted to relate with a very professional woman, altough not my first in "dreams list".
I am asking for these, because I fear to surprise myself "blocked" also in a future session I would chose in the future and it would be a pity both for the expanse and more for the experience in itself.
Have you ever felt yourselves "not inspired" during a session you were desidered for a long time? It can happen only for people doing session for the first time or had you experienced this state of mind also after many sessions? Let my know. Bye to all!

[Makko2]

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[Zenzen]

I think what you're describing is actually more common than people admit.

A lot of people spend weeks, months, or even years imagining a session. In their minds, everything is exciting because they're filling in the blanks with their own fantasies. Then the real session happens and suddenly you're dealing with reality:

• A real person instead of an imagined one
• A hotel room instead of a fantasy setting
• Your own nerves and self-consciousness
• The awareness that time is passing and you're paying for it

That's a lot for the brain to process.

One thing that stood out to me is that you seemed very focused on whether the provider was comfortable, happy, or enjoying the interaction. While it's good to be considerate, I think some clients end up monitoring the provider's mood so much that they stop enjoying the session themselves.

Another thing is that lift & carry and muscle worship sessions can be surprisingly difficult if you don't have a rough plan beforehand. If your favorite activities only take 10–15 minutes, there can be a point where you're thinking, "Now what?"

That doesn't mean the session failed. It just means there wasn't enough structure to keep you engaged for the full time.

I also wouldn't underestimate the importance of choosing someone who is genuinely near the top of your personal wish list. Sometimes we book based on availability, reviews, convenience, or reputation, and then discover that the emotional excitement isn't quite there.

The fact that you weren't highly aroused or completely immersed doesn't necessarily mean anything was wrong. Sometimes expectations are simply higher than reality can reasonably deliver.

If you ever decide to do another session, it might help to:

• Choose someone you are truly excited about meeting.
• Have a few specific activities in mind beforehand.
• Accept that some awkwardness is normal.
• Focus less on "performing correctly" and more on enjoying the experience.

From what you've written, I don't get the impression that sessions aren't for you. It sounds more like you spent a lot of mental energy worrying and analyzing during the session instead of being present in the moment.

Has anyone else experienced this? Being excited for months beforehand, then feeling oddly calm, detached, or even a little overwhelmed once the session actually started? I suspect it's more common than most people realize.

[bruce321]

Taking a more broad approach to your question, sessions aren't something you learn to do overnight. Everyone's different, but likely you'll need to do several to become comfortable. There's also a big element of self-discovery as you attempt to translate your fantasies to reality. You're going to find some aren't what you expected, but if you're willing to try different things, inevitably you'll find ones you hadn't anticipated liking. I fumbled through a myriad of different women/experiences before understanding what I was looking for. In retrospect, I'd suggest finding experienced providers and ask them to guide you through it. Going in with a game plan is fine, but if it's not working out, ask her to show you what she's good at.

[AndersonAndersonjj]

Taking a more broad approach to your question, sessions aren't something you learn to do overnight. Everyone's different, but likely you'll need to do several to become comfortable. There's also a big element of self-discovery as you attempt to translate your fantasies to reality. You're going to find some aren't what you expected, but if you're willing to try different things, inevitably you'll find ones you hadn't anticipated liking. I fumbled through a myriad of different women/experiences before understanding what I was looking for. In retrospect, I'd suggest finding experienced providers and ask them to guide you through it. Going in with a game plan is fine, but if it's not working out, ask her to show you what she's good at.

This seems like it would be so very relatable. I haven't taken the leap and I've known my intense attraction to muscular women for 16 years!

[2ndHoodman]

Taking a more broad approach to your question, sessions aren't something you learn to do overnight. Everyone's different, but likely you'll need to do several to become comfortable. There's also a big element of self-discovery as you attempt to translate your fantasies to reality. You're going to find some aren't what you expected, but if you're willing to try different things, inevitably you'll find ones you hadn't anticipated liking. I fumbled through a myriad of different women/experiences before understanding what I was looking for. In retrospect, I'd suggest finding experienced providers and ask them to guide you through it. Going in with a game plan is fine, but if it's not working out, ask her to show you what she's good at.

This seems like it would be so very relatable. I haven't taken the leap and I've known my intense attraction to muscular women for 16 years!

Dammit man take the leap!

[FBBrocks]

The only times I felt "detached" was when a provider I booked is seriously out of shape, happened only one time, I was nice enough to let her keep the money and talked thro 50% of the session, I understand where you coming from, and you are being too generous. I think one of the reason is that you didn't set up your expectation properly.   

I remember my first few sessions I expect to be pure competitive wrestling with muscular gals, these are the only things I thought I was going to get out from it, till I learned most gals don't like to be competitive, they want you to be willingly beaten with all kind varities, some of them taught me what's muscle worship and stomp etc. and I love it.  so when book a sessionate, it's always a good practice to look at their page to see what they offer.   

From what I gathered, most gals don't like lift & carry and competitive due to high risk of injury, but few gals really into that and really able to kick your azz faster than men.  So yea, what they offer vs what you expect, these have to sync in order to have a great time.   It depends on gals personality too, some has the charisma of a wall, while other is fun as hell.  It takes a couple time to use to it.  And don't worry to much for being a nice guy, I usually test my hands unless they warn me to stop, which never happened, just beware of one area you should never touch unless they advised or priced it