Ever since I was a teenager I fantasized about muscular women and always wanted a fit woman for a girlfriend or wife. Well, anyway, my wife had somewhat okay thighs, but never got in any good shape and I never had a special moment with a woman of my dreams, as shitty as that is to say about one's wife, but it is reality, and hey, I was not her dream man either. Now I am almost 40 and the dream seems dead. wife never gonna get there, and even if she did our marriage is done anyway. To restart would not put me in any advantageous situation, I would bomb out of the dating world pretty hard, with nothing to offer. I suppose I became the schmoe I never accepted I was, but even schmoes seemed to get some action, even if it meant paying for it.

Anyway, for those of us who merely lurked and consumed and never actually partook, does it hurt? Have you gotten over it as you've gotten older and realized it will only ever be a mental fantasy for you? That the sex life and sexiness of some people was never going to be a part of your life? Those dreams and aspirations as a horny young lad were all pipedreams, figments of the imagination. There was always hopium, but some of us were hardly ever well equipped to deal well in the land of dates.

I've noticed as I've accepted my fate and lack of fate I don't care to look at pictures or watch videos anymore. The old libido isn't awakened like it used to be. It's not a burnout per se, I've gone months without looking at pictures or porn adn then looked again, and in the past that would have meant a hard relapse where I would find it difficult to abstain from the muscles for long, but this time I'm just ... meh. I no longer care. It's nice and all that some women, many of whom I see IRL, have great physiques, great gams, but I'm so far gone in my own lack of action that I no longer care and feel asexual or apathetic about it. I suppose it's run its course. Now I'm more interested in hearing the stories of love and loss or similar experiences of my own and I didn't know where else to discuss this other than this forum, which seems dead anyway, but I digress.

Ever since I was a teenager I fantasized about muscular women and always wanted a fit woman for a girlfriend or wife. Well, anyway, my wife had somewhat okay thighs, but never got in any good shape and I never had a special moment with a woman of my dreams, as shitty as that is to say about one's wife, but it is reality, and hey, I was not her dream man either. Now I am almost 40 and the dream seems dead. wife never gonna get there, and even if she did our marriage is done anyway. To restart would not put me in any advantageous situation, I would bomb out of the dating world pretty hard, with nothing to offer. I suppose I became the schmoe I never accepted I was, but even schmoes seemed to get some action, even if it meant paying for it.

Anyway, for those of us who merely lurked and consumed and never actually partook, does it hurt? Have you gotten over it as you've gotten older and realized it will only ever be a mental fantasy for you? That the sex life and sexiness of some people was never going to be a part of your life? Those dreams and aspirations as a horny young lad were all pipedreams, figments of the imagination. There was always hopium, but some of us were hardly ever well equipped to deal well in the land of dates.

I've noticed as I've accepted my fate and lack of fate I don't care to look at pictures or watch videos anymore. The old libido isn't awakened like it used to be. It's not a burnout per se, I've gone months without looking at pictures or porn adn then looked again, and in the past that would have meant a hard relapse where I would find it difficult to abstain from the muscles for long, but this time I'm just ... meh. I no longer care. It's nice and all that some women, many of whom I see IRL, have great physiques, great gams, but I'm so far gone in my own lack of action that I no longer care and feel asexual or apathetic about it. I suppose it's run its course. Now I'm more interested in hearing the stories of love and loss or similar experiences of my own and I didn't know where else to discuss this other than this forum, which seems dead anyway, but I digress.

  Feeling this way at your age you need to speak to someone. Writing this here is not the solution. In the nicest sense  you need professional help for what you're expressing because it's depression at its worst.

Ever since I was a teenager I fantasized about muscular women and always wanted a fit woman for a girlfriend or wife. Well, anyway, my wife had somewhat okay thighs, but never got in any good shape and I never had a special moment with a woman of my dreams, as shitty as that is to say about one's wife, but it is reality, and hey, I was not her dream man either. Now I am almost 40 and the dream seems dead. wife never gonna get there, and even if she did our marriage is done anyway. To restart would not put me in any advantageous situation, I would bomb out of the dating world pretty hard, with nothing to offer. I suppose I became the schmoe I never accepted I was, but even schmoes seemed to get some action, even if it meant paying for it.

Anyway, for those of us who merely lurked and consumed and never actually partook, does it hurt? Have you gotten over it as you've gotten older and realized it will only ever be a mental fantasy for you? That the sex life and sexiness of some people was never going to be a part of your life? Those dreams and aspirations as a horny young lad were all pipedreams, figments of the imagination. There was always hopium, but some of us were hardly ever well equipped to deal well in the land of dates.

I've noticed as I've accepted my fate and lack of fate I don't care to look at pictures or watch videos anymore. The old libido isn't awakened like it used to be. It's not a burnout per se, I've gone months without looking at pictures or porn adn then looked again, and in the past that would have meant a hard relapse where I would find it difficult to abstain from the muscles for long, but this time I'm just ... meh. I no longer care. It's nice and all that some women, many of whom I see IRL, have great physiques, great gams, but I'm so far gone in my own lack of action that I no longer care and feel asexual or apathetic about it. I suppose it's run its course. Now I'm more interested in hearing the stories of love and loss or similar experiences of my own and I didn't know where else to discuss this other than this forum, which seems dead anyway, but I digress.

  Feeling this way at your age you need to speak to someone. Writing this here is not the solution. In the nicest sense  you need professional help for what you're expressing because it's depression at its worst.

That's normal. Many dreams do not come true. Some struggle for even basic necessities. As for love and relationships many men are going to be alone. Women do not have to work as hard to find someone. So feeling depressed or angry about a miserable situation is a normal response.

 The level of self loathing expressed is way beyond normal.  He sees himself as worthless from this.

Eh, I'm not in a depressed state or feel worthless, I am more like in a stuck state where I am inbetween professions and out of financial necessity and family responsibility stuck where I am for the present moment. I journal and have dealt with a lot of my personal problems, and in the case of this forum, sexuality. I think I believe I know why I was always into these women and had particular fantasies, because of how scrawny I was and our society's expectations on how strong and manly and dominant men should be and my cope was to turn it into a fetish since I was straight. Anyway, I prefer to write in the clearest and most direct way on this forum, I don't pretend to care to dance around a thing since I am anon here. Like Montaigne, I prefer to be as honest and real with myself as possible.

I would prefer it if others would share how their dream of being with a fbb or fit woman of their dreams and kinks didn't turn out, like actually didn't turn out and now they are at the point where they think maybe it won't turn out. Maybe it will turn out for me in the future, maybe not, but I also don't want to keep living in a fantasy world because for 20+ years I lived in that fantasy.

Hold on wait

Was this a dream or an expectation? Cause it sounds more like you expected to one day meet and marry one and I can almost guarantee no one on here ever actually expects that to happen. And you still had that expectation while you were married?

I think the fetish was so intense from puberty that my fantasy became an expectation. Nowadays I know it's only a fantasy, hence the dream dying, but yes, I can see that, for those who knew it was never going to be a reality for them, there was no death of a dream, as they would continue deciding to acknowledge or reject their fantasy.

Wow...you're "almost 40"....I only wish I was that young again....lol

Um, lack of libido at that young of an age can easily be helped with a testosterone prescription from your doctor.

If it helps you, I was divorced and a bit out of shape.  Joined a crossfit gym, got in really good shape in less than a year and ended up dating two very muscular girls from the gym...and I was late 40's.  They were early 30's...

So you still have time my friend!

Thank you, I appreciate the positivity. Perhaps the dream doesn't need to die, but I must get my sh*t together first, which I am currently in the process of doing.  Hope to turn it around.

Thank you, I appreciate the positivity. Perhaps the dream doesn't need to die, but I must get my sh*t together first, which I am currently in the process of doing.  Hope to turn it around.

We wish you well my friend. I want to get good news for a change.

Well I never had that dream, because, living in a country with a lack of interest into bb by the women, it was very hard to make it true.
The lack of libido is quite different, did find something else which can give that libido? If not you should ask to a professional, if yes your tastes changed and it's not so alarming.

Keep on dreaming, you are still young.

Wow...you're "almost 40"....I only wish I was that young again....lol

Um, lack of libido at that young of an age can easily be helped with a testosterone prescription from your doctor.

If it helps you, I was divorced and a bit out of shape.  Joined a crossfit gym, got in really good shape in less than a year and ended up dating two very muscular girls from the gym...and I was late 40's.  They were early 30's...

So you still have time my friend!

This shit right here.

Eh, I'm not in a depressed state or feel worthless, I am more like in a stuck state where I am inbetween professions and out of financial necessity and family responsibility stuck where I am for the present moment. I journal and have dealt with a lot of my personal problems, and in the case of this forum, sexuality. I think I believe I know why I was always into these women and had particular fantasies, because of how scrawny I was and our society's expectations on how strong and manly and dominant men should be and my cope was to turn it into a fetish since I was straight. Anyway, I prefer to write in the clearest and most direct way on this forum, I don't pretend to care to dance around a thing since I am anon here. Like Montaigne, I prefer to be as honest and real with myself as possible.

I would prefer it if others would share how their dream of being with a fbb or fit woman of their dreams and kinks didn't turn out, like actually didn't turn out and now they are at the point where they think maybe it won't turn out. Maybe it will turn out for me in the future, maybe not, but I also don't want to keep living in a fantasy world because for 20+ years I lived in that fantasy.

I was divorced at 45 and felt the same way but I realized that I had to get out there and just enjoy my life.  I met a great woman, but she is unaware of my fetish and that's ok.  I did however meet a lady when I was still single.  She was a personal trainer at a private club and when we had our first date, she showed up in a tight mini-skirt that blew me away and really excited me.  However, she talked about her ex way too much and he was a cop, so I decided that it was a no-go.  But man, she had a rockin body.

Ever since I was a teenager I fantasized about muscular women and always wanted a fit woman for a girlfriend or wife. Well, anyway, my wife had somewhat okay thighs, but never got in any good shape and I never had a special moment with a woman of my dreams, as shitty as that is to say about one's wife, but it is reality, and hey, I was not her dream man either. Now I am almost 40 and the dream seems dead. wife never gonna get there, and even if she did our marriage is done anyway. To restart would not put me in any advantageous situation, I would bomb out of the dating world pretty hard, with nothing to offer. I suppose I became the schmoe I never accepted I was, but even schmoes seemed to get some action, even if it meant paying for it.

Anyway, for those of us who merely lurked and consumed and never actually partook, does it hurt? Have you gotten over it as you've gotten older and realized it will only ever be a mental fantasy for you? That the sex life and sexiness of some people was never going to be a part of your life? Those dreams and aspirations as a horny young lad were all pipedreams, figments of the imagination. There was always hopium, but some of us were hardly ever well equipped to deal well in the land of dates.

I've noticed as I've accepted my fate and lack of fate I don't care to look at pictures or watch videos anymore. The old libido isn't awakened like it used to be. It's not a burnout per se, I've gone months without looking at pictures or porn adn then looked again, and in the past that would have meant a hard relapse where I would find it difficult to abstain from the muscles for long, but this time I'm just ... meh. I no longer care. It's nice and all that some women, many of whom I see IRL, have great physiques, great gams, but I'm so far gone in my own lack of action that I no longer care and feel asexual or apathetic about it. I suppose it's run its course. Now I'm more interested in hearing the stories of love and loss or similar experiences of my own and I didn't know where else to discuss this other than this forum, which seems dead anyway, but I digress.

I know this is a year old, but you do realize Sherry Priami didn’t seriously start training until she was like 39/40 and this year at what 44-45’ finished 4th in the Olympia?

Its never too late

I always wonder how much effort guys who think "the dream died" put into putting themselves in positions to get with muscular women.

Gonna sound harsh, but the vast majority of schmoes that I have seen are woefully out of shape. Get to the gym and lift. Get involved with your fitness community and network within. You have to put yourself out there to find these women.