The project chic. Women get involved in bodybuilding for many reasons however, I have met some that attribute a husband or boyfriend for getting them into the sport. My ex was a bodybuilder that was (for lack of a better word) created by her ex-husband. I didn’t criticize her like her ex-husband but it was this kindness and lack of pressure that eventually contributed to her abandoning weight training completely. My question is for those who have influenced their wives or girlfriends to take-up bodybuilding. How did you do it and what advice can you offer?

I'd love to hear some stories. It sounds like an enjoyable life.

Personally I think it's a terrible idea, unless you yourself are competing. In order to inspire you should be willing to go through it yourself.

It would also make sense if she already showed interest in it. Maybe an ex dancer, gymnast, athlete who has already had experience could be encouraged.

But someone without the will to do it, will undoubtedly quit or cheat when you're not around

This probably isn't the answer that you want to hear, but it's a bad idea to date someone with the intention of "molding" them to fit what you find attractive.  The reason that your ex stopped bodybuilding after she starting dating you was probably because she never had an interest in bodybuilding to begin with, and was forced into that lifestyle by her then-husband.  Her leaving the sport probably had nothing to do with your "kindness and lack of pressure" toward her. 

I dated someone who was into powerlifting, but she was always interested in weight training, and when she met me, she wanted to train heavy with me without my even suggesting the idea to her.  If she is interested in bodybuilding, or for that matter any kind of hobby or activity, encourage her, but don't force her into a training routine rooted toward your personal desires.  Or, get into bodybuilding yourself, and if she is getting involved after seeing you dive into it, go from there.

Thanks for the lesson in morals VegasAce but, I'm an evil dude. I cheat on tests. I drive over the speed limit and I've taken PEDs. Now to quote myself.

My question is for those who have influenced their wives or girlfriends to take-up bodybuilding. How did you do it and what advice can you offer?

I'm trying to reconcile the combination of "chic" and your hypothetical Svengali scenario.

This probably isn't the answer that you want to hear, but it's a bad idea to date someone with the intention of "molding" them to fit what you find attractive.  The reason that your ex stopped bodybuilding after she starting dating you was probably because she never had an interest in bodybuilding to begin with, and was forced into that lifestyle by her then-husband.  Her leaving the sport probably had nothing to do with your "kindness and lack of pressure" toward her. 

I dated someone who was into powerlifting, but she was always interested in weight training, and when she met me, she wanted to train heavy with me without my even suggesting the idea to her.  If she is interested in bodybuilding, or for that matter any kind of hobby or activity, encourage her, but don't force her into a training routine rooted toward your personal desires.  Or, get into bodybuilding yourself, and if she is getting involved after seeing you dive into it, go from there.

Sir,  you know their are women who try to mold men into many things . They always say "I can change him." People do this more than you think. It may explain why certain relationships fail. Maybe the best suggestion is to find a common interest. No one should be forced to do something. You can't say she did not have an interest may be she just lost it. Sometimes you do lose interest in the things you enjoy after awhile. 

I'm trying to reconcile the combination of "chic" and your hypothetical Svengali scenario.

An ex-girlfriend who is fully aware of my attraction to female bodybuilders contacted me with the intention of getting back together. The scenario is neither Svengali or hypothetical.

Personally I think it's a terrible idea, unless you yourself are competing. In order to inspire you should be willing to go through it yourself.

I think you're right. I would need to go through it myself and it is a terrible idea. The obvious plan is to get her to train with me. However, I would like some input from someone that has actual experience rather than opinion.

I influenced an ex to take up bodybuilding, but it didn't last more than 12-18 months. She was a competitive athlete in the past, worked in the sports industry and had a naturally muscular physique. She joined with a group of bodybuilders to train and learned a lot about the sport. I even hired a personal trainer for her. She made it on stage for a bodybuilding competition to assist with prize giving, but did not compete herself. And even though she made good progress in building muscular size, her heart wasn't in it. The dieting and getting lean was the part that she didn't like, and when her work schedule filled up, she dropped it.

Based on my experience, I agree with those who have opined that it's not a good idea. The bodybuilding lifestyle is self-centred and requires extreme self-discipline. You can have the right genetics, sports background, opportunity etc....but if you don't have the required attitude and personal characteristics, it won't work.

Just to add a point, I also found that expecting my partner to bodybuild added a further issue to our relationship. In setting up the expectation, it became a bit of a focus, and when she did not fulfill my dream, it led to disappointment.  After that relationship ended, I vowed to only look for an existing bodybuilder or a naturally muscular woman. That led to more satisfying relationships.

Took me years of going to the gym by myself and positive reinforcement , she initially hated it but as her stamina improved she started enjoying it more, imo you should both do it, makes it easier/better

First off keep in mind that you're battling over 20 yrs of horrible PR and negative images of women having more muscle. You've still got guys posting those waaay overblown morphs with celeb headshots pasted onto them...or even worse, posting extreme fbbs with tons of sides on Youtube and then labeling it "motivation"...when in reality it's only motivation for them to do the exact opposite. This is precisely the image that pushed women towards the yoga and pink dumbbells, so priority #1 = don't use that.

In order to attract women to training it's critical to use only the most positive images. Getting healthier, stronger, empowered and more attractive shouldn't (normally) involve any sort of coercion. For me personally that transformation process has been one of the biggest turn-ons with all of this. There's absolutely nothing like taking out of shape females and turning them onto all the benefits of proper training and diet. Also, utilize only those women who will provide the highest level inspiration...Pauline Nordin, Alex Albu, Ashley Dishman, Emma Hartley, Cass Martin, etc..     

It wont work to influence a girlfriend to become a bodybuilder  unless she isnt a natural born freak already.
Bodybuilders must have a love-hate relationship for torture and pain and hungry feelings and looking different and behave unsocial ect ect. 

Just try to influence your girlfriend to become a mountaineer. Or a philatelist. Or a Go-Player. Or make her to learn the Violin.

You can suggest those hobbys, but influence her if she was a Couchpotato for the last 20 years? I doubt it very much.

It wont work to influence a girlfriend to become a bodybuilder  unless she isnt a natural born freak already.

Is or isn't?

To those that say it is not possible check out this thread.
http://saradas.org/index.php?topic=241390.0

It wont work to influence a girlfriend to become a bodybuilder  unless she isnt a natural born freak already.

Is or isn't?

To those that say it is not possible check out this thread.
http://saradas.org/index.php?topic=241390.0

The example given is of a mutual decision. In addition, both partners are working out. One could argue that both parties are influencing each other, and that both are participants in a project.

The example given is of a mutual decision. In addition, both partners are working out. One could argue that both parties are influencing each other, and that both are participants in a project.

Personally I think it's a terrible idea, unless you yourself are competing. In order to inspire you should be willing to go through it yourself.

I think you're right. I would need to go through it myself and it is a terrible idea. The obvious plan is to get her to train with me. However, I would like some input from someone that has actual experience rather than opinion.

On October 9th Drbench012 suggested training together to which I agreed. Your reply suggests you've not read the entire thread. I have enjoyed reading about your experiences with dating female bodybuilders that you've posted in general chat. However, regarding the woman you influenced to take up training that you've talked about in this thread, do you think that it may have been more successful if you trained with her?